My name is Vicki, spelled V-I-C-K-I. It’s not short for anything, just Vicki.
It’s a frequently misspelled name. I get Vicky, Vickie, Vikki, and many other iterations.
I’ve never loved my first name, but it’s part of who I am. I don’t mind the odd misspelling, but if someone does it repeatedly I start to feel frustrated or even a little sad. But people have a lot to think about and remember in this world, so is it really a big deal if they consistently misspell my name? I believe it is, and here’s why.
Names, for better or worse, mean a lot. In many cultures around the world, names are tied to family heritage, religious meaning, or hopes and wishes. As such, misspelling names can feel dismissive and disrespectful, especially if it happens repeatedly.
Incorrect spelling or pronunciation of names can lead to feelings of exclusion at work, and constantly correcting others on your name takes energy that could be better used elsewhere.
If your cultural group has suffered oppression, a misspelled name can even feel like an erasure.
In the worst-case scenario, those in power may deliberately mispronounce a name to dehumanize or belittle someone, as seen in the repeated incorrect pronunciation of Kamala Harris’s name by her opponents.
The way we treat names sends a message, whether we are aware of it or not. The question is, what message do you want to send? One of respect or one of dismissal?
It’s perfectly okay to state or spell someone’s name incorrectly the first time, or to slip up every so often. If you do, apologize and ask for the correct way. If you’re unsure how to pronounce someone’s name, ask! I’ve never had that effort go unappreciated.
Showing respect can sometimes feel overwhelming because it means different things across cultures, communities, and personal experiences. What one group views as a sign of respect might feel rude to another.
However, getting someone’s name right is an easy win. It’s a direct, simple gesture that shows you care about a person’s identity and humanity. By making the effort to pronounce and spell names correctly, you acknowledge the individual behind the name, signaling that you value them for who they are.